So I just got another job rejection, for a grad scheme that sounded awesome. The company contributed to medical research but also had a branch which showcased art which related to medicine and the body. And now I’m back to square one, with no job lined up after graduation and no idea what to do next.
I failed the ‘situational judgement test’, which asks you to say what you’d do in a certain scenario. Now this is the heartbreaking bit. Because it wasn’t that my maths skills weren’t good enough, or that I didn’t write the right thing in my application. It was that they didn’t like my decisions, or the kind of person I was. But these things are so black-and-white. You tick a box saying “I’d email this person and ask that person and do that thing” and they decide that you’re wrong, and that you’d fuck up if you were actually employed to do that job. It doesn’t say time scale or who you’re working with, or anything else that we all use to decide the best course of action in real life.
It’s hard to pick yourself up again, and tell yourself that you are employable, and you could get a job, and that you won’t be stuck working in Spoons for the next ten years. It’s hard to find another job just like it, especially in the charity sector where there is so little money to employ new people. You re-evaluate so much: is this actually what I want to do in my life? Am I right for that line of work? It fucks you up.
But life goes on. I have to go to a lecture and do my work and keep on plugging away to this Masters certificate. I’ll find something else, right?